A reader of the blog suggested that I write about foreign domestic workers in Lebanon. The topic has been on my mind for a while but I didn’t know how to approach it. I was hesitant to use my usual sarcastic style given the seriousness of the subject.

We often hear stories about domestic workers who are being mistreated; they are physically and mentally abused, harassed, beaten up, sexually assaulted or raped. We also hear about domestic helpers who committed suicide, ran away from their employer's house, stole valuable belongings or even killed their employer...

These stories usually evolve and frequently portray the foreign worker - who happens to be a female most of the times- as culpable!

Most families hire maids as soon as they have their first baby. It has become an integral part of the life cycle: people graduate, find a job, marry, have their first child, hire a housekeeper, buy an SUV to fit both the baby’s car seat and the maid...

When my siblings and I decided that my parents needed help at home, I contacted an agency that specializes in hiring foreign domestic workers. When the lady finally arrived, the head of the agency told me to pick her up from the airport at 10:00 am. I told him that I thought that her plane arrives at 3:00 in the morning, but he said: "that's fine, she can wait for you at the General Security. You don't need to bother and go in the middle of the night to pick her up!" And that was just a preview of the discriminiation that foreign domestic workers face in Lebanon.

The minute a foreign worker sets foot in Beirut, she is greeted with all sorts of insulting and discriminatory practices:

I- Communication:

1- No matter what her surname is, we change it to something that is "easy" to spell.

2- In conversation, we refer to her using her nationality. For example: "Kifa Srilankitik?" (How is your Sri Lankan?) Note: this question isn't intended to inquire about the maid’s well-being but rather about how satisfied the employer is with her work.

3- Most domestic workers are called "Srilankiyeh" (Sri Lankan) regardless of their original nationality because historically, the first wave of domestic workers who first arrived to Lebanon in the post-war days mainly came from Sri Lanka.

4- We expect her to speak Arabic but we never show any interest in learning a few words from her own language instead. And when she finally picks up some Arabic, we start using French in her presence so that "she doesn't understand what we're talking about".

5- When addressing her, we use distorted English for no obvious reason. We often mix English and Arabic in the same sentence. "Go bring chawkeh for mister" (go get a fork for mister).

II- Job Description:

1- We expect her to work 24/7 and never rest. When I told my neighbor that it isn't fair that her maid works long hours for only 150$ a month, she told me: "do you know what $150 can do in the Philippines?" Well, I actually don't, but I know that for 150$ a month only, I am not even willing to get out of bed in the morning.

2- As part of the “life cycle” some parents choose to get a dog for their children. This automatically adds a task to the domestic worker’s responsibilities, as she becomes a dog walker. No one cares if she is allergic to dogs or afraid of pets.

3- She is expected to attend all children birthdays and interact with other maids. Often times, these maids are from different nationalities and end up talking to each other in Arabic in the absence of any other common language. 

III- Food:

1- We expect her to eat Lebanese food and enjoy it! Imagine going to China and being obliged to eat cockroaches? I assume “Moujadara” looks exactly like poop for people who aren't familiar with Lebanese cuisine.

2- We expect her to eat small portions. If she's little, it doesn't mean that a "happy meal" will satiate her.

3- We expect her to wait until we've finished eating before she can actually eat herself. Needless to say that she will have to eat in the kitchen alone while everyone else is sitting at the dining table.

4- When we allow her to cook for herself, we complain about the smell of the food. I wonder if garlic and onions, the two main ingredients of any Lebanese dish, smell nicer than curry…

IV- Daily Life:

1- While we call our moms 5 times a day, she is only allowed to call her family once a month.

2- We expect her to always be in a good mood and keep smiling. Unlike her employer, she isn’t allowed to have premenstrual syndromes (PMS) and mood swings.